For K & B, my sisters in suffering- what a gift your friendship in this season has been! xx
But now, O Jacob, listen to the Lord who created you.
O Israel, the one who formed you says,
“Do not be afraid, for I have ransomed you.
I have called you by name; you are mine.
When you go through deep waters,
I will be with you.
When you go through rivers of difficulty,
you will not drown.
When you walk through the fire of oppression,
you will not be burned up;
the flames will not consume you.” Isaiah 43:1-2
Once upon a time I had to sit in the dentist chair for a double root canal. Nobody wants a root canal, let alone a double one but dental things often have a way of surprising us, don’t they? I wanted to do anything to keep the dentist away from my mouth including keep him talking too long and sealing my lips shut but, the pain my teeth were giving me began to outweigh the anticipated pain of the root canal. The hard work needed to be done. While it was far from pleasant, I had to have four different appointments to complete the drilling, decay removal and then be fitted for my crowns. (The teeth kind, not the tiara kind) Even though it was painful, awkward and extremely uncomfortable, my healing journey began when I stopped avoiding the fear of the pain and sat in the chair allowing the master to do the work.
I find that processing our emotional and heart pain isn’t really much different.
A few weeks ago, I had to leave the middle of the church service for the umpteenth time to go cry somewhere. It’s just been that kind of season. It can be as simple as a touch during worship, or my emotions well as God works, or I get triggered, but I find it difficult to turn off the cascades going down my face. (True story: It usually happens on the Sundays that I wear makeup, so in addition to my involuntary facial, I leave church looking something like Jack Sparrow as well…savvy?)
Anyway, I slipped out with a friend, and all the things began tumbling out of me. The question marks, the frustrations, and most of all the lingering question: does God sees me in my pain, and will he do something about it? My kind, discerning, and forthright friend was willing to listen, validate and then challenge me. She asked me if I was willing, to sit in my pain and let God meet me there. I realized that all too often, it is all too easy to sidestep what hurts, or I want to rush through it to get to the other side. I can handle it if there is something to learn. I will tolerate it if there is something I can share with someone else. I will numb it if there is chocolate being offered. And I will pacify it if I don’t like the internal noise that is coming out of me.
But then, I circle back to the root canal. For infection to be rooted out, and health and healing to be restored….I had to get in the chair and I had to yield.
That’s the secret sauce.
That’s where the beauty in our story happens.
That’s where the real healing takes place.
We put our pain on the operating table, (or dentist chair) and let the master go to work.
It’s too easy to get caught up in thinking or feeling what we really need or want to do is procrastinate the pain, but that only makes it worse. And here’s the thing, we think we are pulling the safety switch when really we are only prolonging the inevitable.
Our healing needs to take place.
The only place that true healing can happen is on the altar of offering ourselves to the master physician and letting him do the perfect work that only he can do. So here’s my challenge friends: when pain, heartache, sorrow, grief, or disappointment come your way…..let it. (See authors note below) Get alone with God, and allow him to meet you there. He promises to be with us, and his hands are the surest to heal us. Look to him, let him meet you, let him heal you.
I promise you, your heart and healing are worth it.
Much love,
Joy
(Author’s Note: My intention here is to encourage you to let God in, instead of blocking him out of your pain. I’m not here to minimize or trivialize pain, abuse, trauma or triggers. Each and everyone of those is part of my story. I also want to encourage you if processing what you are going through is too much, to be encouraged to see a professional counselor, talk to trusted and wise friends/ counsel, or seek out a leader in the body of Christ who has experience and can walk with you. Your heart is worth it.)